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Stupid Mommy Tricks - Elizabeth Unexplained
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Stupid Mommy Tricks
I honestly don’t know how parents who regularly use daycare manage. My first experience with drop-off daycare is proof positive that I am spoiled by having an au pair. Normally all I have to do in the morning is get myself ready for work, mix up a batch of formula and get Margaret changed, dressed and fed. That seems like plenty. This morning things were a bit more involved, in spite of the fact that I’d packed the diaper bag with every non-perishable thing she’d need the night before. I do not want to do this every morning. Here is my morning:

7:15 I wake up. I note that Margaret is still fast asleep and seize the opportunity to take a shower without company playing with the shower curtain.

7:45 I have my dress on, but still no tights. Margaret wakes up. I pick her up out of bed before she decides to use her Daddy as a jungle gym.

7:50 Before I can change her sodden overnight diaper we have a containment issue. I get the baby cleaned up and dressed for the day.

8:05 As I’m about to put my tights on I realize that my dress was also a casualty of the containment failure. Oops. I go to the bedroom for a new dress, disturbing Warren again in the process.

8:06 As I’m putting the new dress on I realize that putting tights on before the shot is a stupid idea, plus Warren is awake anyway. I request my morning shot.

8:25 Awake and functional are not the same thing. I finally have my shot. Margaret has refused a bottle.

8:30 I attempt to prepare formula and bottles for daycare with Margaret supervising from my left arm. Sometimes her supervision has a hands-on approach.

8:40 We finally get out the door with diaper bag, bag with formula bottles, cold pack and applesauce, purse and tote bag with daycare paperwork, Load all the stuff into my car, along with the stroller. Pray that my car starts because it inexplicably needed a jump on Saturday.

8:50 Park in Davis Square, extract baby and stroller.

8:55 Sign in to lab for blood draw.

9:05 Get poked. The person doing the draw is really good in spite of the fact that 75% of her attention is on Margaret making cooing noises in her stroller. Margaret gets stickers in spite of the fact that I was the one getting poked.

9:10 Leave Davis Square and head for work.

9:15 The screaming from the back seat commences. Yes, kid, you should have taken that bottle.

9:30 Exit the big dig tunnel. The screaming in the back seat abruptly stops.

9:35 Worry that the baby has somehow managed to strangle herself to death on the car seat harness or choked to death on her stickers.

9:38 Touch baby, but fail to tell if she is breathing or not.

9:40 Arrive at work parking lot. I turn off the ignition but the key won’t turn all the way and come out. Why won’t the key come out?!!! Proceed to have minor panic attack about my car having developed to strange electrical fault.

9:42 Extract sleeping (but still breathing!) baby from the car. Margaret wakes up upon transfer to the stroller and is in a pretty good mood. I load all the stuff into the stroller and leave my car in the parking lot with the key still stuck in the ignition because I don’t seen any good alternative here.

9:45 Arrive at the building that houses the backup daycare and proceed to wait ten minutes for a security escort to the daycare.

9:55 Arrive at the daycare. The workers want to hold Margaret while I fill out paperwork. Margaret screams. I make sure they know she needs a bottle pronto. I cuddle her a bit, but then I have to leave. Margaret screams and claws at my sweater, surprising the daycare worker who is trying to take her with the strength of her grasp.

10:05 I’m back at the car. The key still won’t come out. I am trapped at work, behind the card-swipe gates with a non-functional car with bizarre electrical badness and on top of it all I have a baby and a ton of gear here too.

10:10 I arrive at my area. I proceed to stress about the situation to Neil. My boss wanders by and suggests that since my car is an automatic that I make sure it’s in park.

10:20 I check my car again. My boss fully deserves the big bucks I sure hope the company pays him, because indeed, my car is not in park. My car is not even close to in park because I was a moron and it seems that I was so preoccupied with running Baby Tracker software that I completely neglected to shift at all upon arrive in the parking lot, I just attempted to pull the key out. I feel dumb but relieved as I correct the problem and verify that the car will indeed start again.

On the IVF front, the beta number today was 843. They want me back in on Wednesday because they want to see the number over 1000. I also have an appointment for an ultrasound next week, assuming the Wednesday number is OK.
9 comments or Leave a comment
chenoameg From: chenoameg Date: June 2nd, 2009 12:13 am (UTC) (Link)

Glad to hear the good number news.
enugent From: enugent Date: June 2nd, 2009 12:40 am (UTC) (Link)
I don't think I've heard about this daycare thing yet - is Jomkwan's year up, or is she on vacation, or what?

Are you guys still in touch with Kim Barrett? He has a car story sort of like yours, but probably even worse. After a long business trip, he had to call a tow truck because his car would not start, not even after getting a friend to try to jump start it. However, it started right up for the tow truck operator. After driving a rental automatic for the whole business trip, he had gotten out of the habit of pushing in the clutch while starting the car. :-P

I'm sure you're looking at www.betabase.info and raising your eyebrows at the median hCG numbers just like I am. Good luck!!
greyautumnrain From: greyautumnrain Date: June 2nd, 2009 07:25 am (UTC) (Link)
Jomkwan is on vacation for two weeks. I'm trying out the emergency back-up care that is available at work.
psychohist From: psychohist Date: June 3rd, 2009 06:03 pm (UTC) (Link)
I still game with Kim monday evenings.

As I recall, the other part of that story was that his car started for me, but not for him. It may have taken the tow truck operator to figure out that the difference was that I was pressing the clutch.
enugent From: enugent Date: June 3rd, 2009 06:15 pm (UTC) (Link)
Huh, I didn't remember that you were actually present for the story.

Give my regards to Kim next time you see him. Better yet, give him my email address - I'd like to hear what he's up to.
jaedian From: jaedian Date: June 2nd, 2009 03:08 am (UTC) (Link)
As soon as I saw that you couldn't get your key out, I wondered if you had forgotten to put it in park. The reason of course is that this happened to me under equally distracting circumstances. I didn't actually leave the car, I think I figured it out before it came to that.

I can sympathize though. Although these days I spend more of my days like that then I would have expected staying at home instead of working. But there is always somewhere to be and at least one kid, if not all being dragged along. A. was late for tennis today because J. is currently refusing to wear clothes. More thing came up and I realized we got there but she had no shoes!
jaedian From: jaedian Date: June 2nd, 2009 03:09 am (UTC) (Link)
I hope the numbers continue to be good!
astra_nomer From: astra_nomer Date: June 2nd, 2009 02:15 pm (UTC) (Link)
Yay on the numbers!

Sounds to me like you have a clear case of pregnancy-brain... ;)
enugent From: enugent Date: June 3rd, 2009 06:17 pm (UTC) (Link)
How did Margaret do with her first day of daycare? Was it easier or harder to get out the door and to drop her off yesterday and today?
9 comments or Leave a comment